I am the God of Hell-Fire and I bring you:

Fire.

Kind of a let down, actually. It really shouldn't be – fire is quite useful, but it's just so, you know... expected. Honestly, you thought I'd bring you something else? That would have been odd. I don't even know why, or if, I am apologizing. I am the God of Hell-Fire, this is what I bring. So what if it's not exactly counter-intuitive? You get fire. If you are really in the mood to question a God, we can discuss what other items you may appreciate more, but personally I am in no mood for negotiating.

...

OK I've thought about it for a bit and I'm officially cheesed off. You came here with your eyes open – it's all written on the sign. Do you go to Ming the Merciless for absolution? Does Joan of Arc travel in a straight line? If you wanted something instead of fire, then why are we even talking? Go and spend your fire-forsaken life with the God of Paper-Doilies or whatever. Rot somewhere far away from me. Ingrate.